Letting Go (For Marvin) (January 28, 2016)

In between pressed pages
Of bitter sheets
Shimmers a flower
I once pressed
Today a brother (Marvin) said to me
I am blessed by my pain
Inside I'm shy
But I am destined
To share rhymes because we
Poets reflect the Divine
And even though none of we
 Are perfect by design
We shine with brilliant light
Every time we bless the mic

Wisdom is gained
In every fallen tear
Years of pain
Can wear a soul down
Or it can allow
New pathways
For the waters of Life to flow
Sewing seeds for tomorrow
our Sorrow reminds us
What is worth fighting for
And what we must let go

It is Well (January 28, 2016)

I lift my head up to the light
The skylight drips
Ancient resin beads of sunshine
Raining down on me
I am in the presence of
The divine
Mind over matter
And I recall
As many times
As my soul has shattered
I have come back together
Stronger than I ever was
Before
Doors close, yes
But the windows of heaven open
Showing me the way
I have learned to say
It is well
It is well
With my soul
Self control is an issue in my life
Wise words spoken
open my heart as
Christ consciousness begins
to Resonate within
But deep in my chest
I know
The sins that weigh me down
My crown sits kind of heavy
And I modify my bearings
My greatest desire is
To be the best I can be
In this life
I rise to meet the Great Creator
As the Native blood in me would say
These things that cause me sway
Can be either obstacles
Or stepping stones
I sleep alone most nights
Not because I have to
But because I know it's right
And no matter how many times
I fail
I will not give up the fight
Wise words are spoken
opening me up
To Christ consciousness within
In the sea of life I swim
one day I know
I shall reach the golden shore

It is well
It is well
With my soul

Feast of Lupercalia

For all of you who wished me a "Happy Valentine's Day" only to receive some quippy political answer, I apologize (only if I offended you). The truth is "Valentine's Day" is just another parasitic capitalistically driven stolen holiday that America celebrates to make money and solidify control. For the Roman driven Western Christian world captured and slaughtered many peoples as the West was "Won".  If you choose to celebrate "Valentine's Day" that is up to you, however all of you who know me well know I must speak the truth.

Love should be offered to your significant other, your life partner, your husband or wife three sixty five. Let's keep it one hundred/one hundred. I don't believe in fifty-fifty.

America has devised a plan. Keep the one percent happy! For all of you who believe yourselves to be anti-establishment, ask yourself, what do you really know about the history of the holiday (holy day) you are celebrating.

The power is in the people. We continue to feed the machine, and the machine is strong. Consider your history. Consider the back story. And if you still decide to celebrate "Valentine's day" I will wish you a happy "Valentine's day". However, please if you know me and love me remember, I DO NOT CELEBRATE money making holidays in a system that is designed to keep the oppressed oppressed and keep the one percent fed.

I love you all. Each and every day.

I love my life.

Do No Harm

In any relationship, whether your best friend, your lover, your sister or your mother, there are going to be plenty of moments where what one half of the union needs is the complete opposite of what the other half would benefit from.

A person I love very much has never had an easy time facing the pain they cause in others. This person is one of the hardest working people I have ever known. They are spontaneous, fun, and amazing with surprises. Adventure should be their middle name and life with them is never boring. You can talk to them about any subject. Their curiosity and intelligence will accommodate stimulating conversation most of the time. But try to bring up a way you have felt pain by them and it is change the subject, laugh it off and at best better brush it under the heaviest rug on the planet.

This person told me to let go of the past. I guess some of the healing that could have come over the years has been stunted because they never owned up to their portion of what went wrong. Never said, "I'm sorry". Never claimed responsibility for my broken heart. Exasperated this evening they said to me, "I hurt you!?"

I was stunned. Tears in my eyes, I brushed it all back underneath the surface and told the sleeping beast now wide awake to return to its slumber.

It isn't easy when one person's pain is healed in one manner while the person they hurt needs the exact opposite to find healing. And I guess this is when I have to put on my big girl panties, and give it over to the Divine. I guess it is time to lift it to the light and let it go. Truth is, this person loves me and took care of me and has held me close for many years. It just would have been nice had they been able to validate the silent pain I held on to for so long.

Since they are not able, and I adore all that is right in this soul...I must now lift it up and let it go...May my pain blow away on this Winter wind. May I shed my last tears from the pain I held within. May I relinquish my grief to the Great Spirit who truly knows me. May I weep no more. May I hold on to the love. May I hold on to the laughter. May I hold on to every good thing our love ever created. I anticipate greatness. I lift myself up to the light. I will become the best of me. Holding on to yesterday's pain will get me nowhere.

Rivers run deep. Dark caverns know. The light is replete with sorrows let go. I love my life and every twist it takes. I shake off my sorrow. From slumber awake. It is well. It is well with my soul.

Manifesting Open Doors

I am happy to report that I have arrived safely in Rochester (as most of you already know) and am feeling adjusted and acclimated post transition. As I await the decision from the Peace Corps, I am filling my time catching up with loved ones, visiting Agape, catching up on a stack of books I longed to read during the four years of my Bachelor's Degree, Writing and organizing new thought, and involving myself in my community.

I am participating in a play, written by Grace Flores, "The Waiting Room" and feeling spiritually amazed at her talent for pulling currents out of the ether and putting them on paper. My first week and a half has certainly not been uneventful. I have had many spiritual revelations during this time and am cautiously walking forward in light and love with the intentions of manifesting the highest resolution my life is capable of.

Tomorrow I will be working with Sharon Turner and participating in a poetry workshop for Rochester Youth. I am excited and looking forward to this event. Agape is urging me in many amazing directions with the hopes that I do not return to waiting tables but instead answer my calling full time in a manner that will help pay the bills.

I am working with Judith Brink, of Prison Action Network, and my community here in the Roc to put together a networking event where those of us greatly concerned with reforming current prison system legislation can come together and amplify. I am really looking forward to manifesting this event.

I am asking those of you who have offered me constant love and support to pray with me that the Universe will manifest the doors I should walk through and show me the way. I love waiting tables. I am good at it and it paid my bills for many years. However, I would much rather spend my time working in my community, speaking my truth, sharing my music and helping build a brighter tomorrow. That being said, if anyone in the Rochester community needs my energy and talent, please let me know. I have done a lot of keynote speaking and charity events where I perform my poetry and/or my music. I am ready, willing and able.

I believe in the power of my destiny. I know that my path is opening in front of me. I believe I will look back on this six months and be amazed at how much I was able to accomplish; amazed by how many good things came my way. That is not to say it will be without challenges and obstacles meant for me to overcome. Stronger I am daily. This is my beautiful life. Thank you for sharing it with me.

~RAin Christi.

Scratching in the Wall

I half expected to wake up this morning to a family of possums snuggled up in my living room. The scratching began underneath the bathtub and has remained there for months. I told my landlord, and when he didn't seem concerned, I tried to take the same stance. Unfortunately, the creature that lives underneath my house and now inside the walls is not quiet! A couple native Floridians have told me that it is most likely fruit rats seeking warmth. I think it is a bigger animal,  but maybe this fruit rat just has really big claws and is really clumsy. Whatever it is, it is nocturnal and loves nothing more than to keep me awake. C'est La vie.

Yesterday, was a day riddled with obstacles. Monday afternoon I spent quality hours of my life completing my Experimental Design and Analysis (for IBM SPSS Statistics) final project. This class has certainly been my nemesis and has kept me frustrated all semester. I put a lot of effort into this project and was very satisfied with it as I sent it off to my professor via Turn-it-in. I went to Sawgrass Lake Park with Tommy and afterward to work, feeling light and free. Monday night I come home from work to find an email waiting from my Professor. He did not receive my word file, only my SPSS output file. !!!!!!!!

For the first time EVER! I had not saved my work or sent myself a copy. There was some kind of glitch with Turn-it-in and now I am shaking with panic. Ander, my friend who tutors in the Student Success Center where I had completed my work said not to worry, the file would be there in the morning. Unfortunately, Ander was wrong. The computers in the lab go in to deep freeze overnight and most files are erased to save space on public computers. Curtis (one of our Tech wizzes on campus) did all he could to thaw the deep freeze but was unable to recover my file. So I did it all over again. I don't think it was as spectacular as it was the first time, but it was the best I had...

Furthermore, my thesis documentary fought me as I tried to copy it from my hard drive. It first wanted to take six hours to render. It is One hour and ten minutes long! I bought two hour dvd's. Somehow it wasn't long enough. It got to the very end of the documentary (after almost two hours of rendering). I am talking the last thirty two seconds and told me the DVD wasn't large enough. AGGHHHHHH! So after redoing my Statistics final project I went to five stores trying to find the right DVD's. Finally I found them at Office Depot.

Then, Stacey calls and says the city (after we have received inspection and approval by the fire marshall) said that we cannot have anything outside in the parking lot the night of my show. We were wanting to put the food and vendor tents outside to make room for our guests inside the intimate venue.

That was my day yesterday. The good news is, I turned in my thesis (DVD's and all), Stacey and I are meeting today to put our creative heads together and find a way to make Saturday night smooth and beautiful, and I have one more final left to take.

I swear, someone should teach me how to do cartwheels so I can cartwheel my way across the stage at graduation!

Thank you all for the continued love and support.

~Rain.

Her Last Stand

            America the great has stood as a hegemonic power since the 1890’s (Flint & Taylor, 2007: p. 55). Large portions of this semester we have discussed how long we envision America remaining in the seat of hegemony. The world has become more connected thanks to the digital age. The world has begun to see America for who she truly is. The world has begun to contest much of what we stand for. In a brilliant article, Socialization and Hegemonic Power (Ikenberry & Kupchan, 1990), the authors state how imperative it is for the elite (as opposed to the masses) to emulate the hegemonic culture that has been articulated. Socialization of the hegemon simply cannot take place without this emulation by the elite. This is America’s greatest threat.

            Already the world is juxta-positioned on the precipice of a catalyst. We are hovering between the way the world once worked and the new global digital society being forged daily. The new hegemon may be a corporation or perhaps this newly forged world will need not hegemonic power at all. Of course there are still international theorists who use American exceptionalism to argue that she will not fall to the same fate as past hegemons (Layne, 2006). Only time may tell what shall truly come to pass.

            What is obvious at this moment is that America is no longer this great mystery miracle melting pot to most of the globe. Most of the globe now has access to the same internet we do and those who do not most likely soon will. Our façade of “justice and liberty for all” is now recognized as a mask and much of what we do is being questioned by countries which are beginning to think for themselves. What will America mean to the world of tomorrow? How long can America stand strong in the face of truth? How long can America convince the world she always cared? How long can America make this new digital world believe her way is the best?    

            The greatest opportunity lying dormant for America would be to roll with the changing times. If America were to become more global; if America were to become involved in other cultures around the globe; if America were to be as passionate about learning as she was about funding wars; if America was willing to evolve, America may show the world why she became a leader in the first place. This generation of up and coming American leaders are studying hard, they are getting involved in global politics, they are travelling the world and reading incredible books, and they are ready for the world of tomorrow. America’s greatest opportunity can be realized through her youth.

            The only way we can make a sound tomorrow for this undulating world, is to recognize how we impact one another not merely economically but culturally, intellectually and spiritually. This generation of graduates is looking at things without the rose colored glasses of American exceptionalism. This generation of graduates is willing to debate for what they believe in. This generation of graduates is well versed on the wars and politics that drive them around the world. What the United Nations began, a true global council could finish. The best thing America could do to solidify her status in the upcoming global shift would be to lead the way into the dawning of a new age. Of course, it is most certain there will always be wars, and there will probably also always be greed and manipulation; however, the countries of the world stand to learn much from one another and America should lead the way. The articulation of the American culture did not honor the original statements made in the declaration of Independence. This is the day and the time for America the Great to redeem herself. Should she choose to refuse this great opportunity, she will instead witness her Last Stand.

References:

Flint, C., & Taylor, P. J. (2007). Political geography: world-economy, nation-state, and locality. Pearson Education.

Ikenberry, G. J., & Kupchan, C. A. (1990). Socialization and hegemonic power. International organization, 44(03), 283-315.

Layne, C. (2006). The unipolar illusion revisited: The coming end of the United States' unipolar moment. International security, 31(2), 7-41.