In the Still

As some of you know, my former mother in law, Jo-an Johnson passed away this week. Her husband passed away about a year prior, and my thoughts definitely went to my ex-husband. He has one of those families that make you wish all families came just like that! Mom & Dad Johnson left a solid impact on my life and I am honored to have carried the family name for so long.

I awoke to the stillness of a pre-Sun Saturday morning and realized I have a lot to say. I would like to honor the Johnson name today and state for the record that I could not be the woman I am today without the Johnson tribe.

I was eighteen. I was homeless. Brad and his roommate at that time took me in, and allowed me to stay. Less than two weeks later I told my best friend that I would marry him.

Not to dishonour my family but I by no means had an easy childhood. Yet, for all my parents did wrong, they did so very much right. However, it took Brad many patient years to work his majik within my soul. I was young, and very broken. I did a lot of stupid things that he forgave me for. I had a lot of deep emotional imbalances that he walked me through. I was very confused and he helped me find the light. I could never repay him. What I can do is pay it forward.

I am not that confused and broken young woman anymore. Brad is responsible for much of the woman sitting here typing today. Now, obviously, we are no longer together and forever did not mean forever for us. But, I would not trade one day of what we did have. I am capable of so much more because of him and his family.

Brad's parents had that kind of love that every couple wants to believe is possible for them. I believe Brad has now found that kind of love himself. I am grateful for every step I made in my life. I am especially grateful for all the pain I have seen. It has only served to make me stronger.

Because of you, I found my foundation. Because of you, I was blessed with words that described the things I knew to be truth. Because of you, I walk stronger. Because of you, I am me.

I would like to take this time to acknowledge those that come into our life whether in passing, for a season, for many years, or for the rest of our lives that have touched us profoundly. This blog would become extremely long if I mentioned every name. But, I am only the woman I am because of every hand that has ever healed me, every smile that has ever reached me, every breath that has ever been expelled in my direction. We are ONE! A cosmically engaged universe. Scientifically explained that what we do affects all living things.

Remember those that have moved you! Acknowledge those that have augmented your flow for the better. Show caution to those that are sent to test and tempt you. Solid on your path. Be the best that you are. We are all capable of so much more!

We are made of stardust....and like dust in the wind we return again to the Cosmic Flow.